there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize