All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
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