its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
