I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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