It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
the day after is always just damage control
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize