Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
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