Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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