Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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