he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
