Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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