I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize