chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
