he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
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