I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Randomize
