hotel room ftw
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
