rhymes with "ouble enetration"
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
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i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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