i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Boobs speak an international language.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize