I want to have your abortion
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Randomize
