i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
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