I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
So i guess my mom went into the kitchen and asked me why i was making mac and cheese at 4 in the morning and apparently i yelled at her to "get the fuck back bitch you don't know my life"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
