But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
