The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
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He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
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fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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