Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
