Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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