i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
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I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
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I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
pray to the hookup gods
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
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