The best revenge is premature balding
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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