Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I FOUND THE LEGS
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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