similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
