It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
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this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
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Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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