You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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