butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
