Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
there was a trapeze. enough said
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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