How drunk are you??
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.