She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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