party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
