Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize