Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
