I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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