brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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