I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Randomize
