I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
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