the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I have already put on my inside pants.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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