This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize