Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
Randomize
