you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
Randomize
