just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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