At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
