I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize