Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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