Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
two words: eviction party
I just found puke in my bra..
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
