why didn't you poke me back
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
