I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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